Don't expose young children to fantasy fiction.
I was reading the following article--
and I thought it was so INSANE. Write a letter to the monster? Give your child a special toy to help him deal with his fears about the monster? WHY ARE YOU TEACHING YOUNG CHILDREN WHO CANNOT UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN REALITY AND FICTION ABOUT MONSTERS IN THE FIRST PLACE? It's just mean.
In the world I live in, at some point between 8pm and 10pm my toddler tells me he wants to go to bed or I tell him I want to go to bed and.... we go to bed. He is not afraid of under the bed, the closet or the dark. He doesn't hesitate to walk around the house in the dark if there is something he wants in another room or to go outside when it is dark to get a toy he wants. He has had a total of three nightmares in his entire life and all three took place the week after we moved into a new house and they were about things like there being no more cookies or someone taking a toy from him.
I listen to people talk about their children's nightmares and struggles with bedtime and irrational fears and... I feel so sad for them and for their poor, scared kids. I am happy to be raising my son the way I am!! So happy to keep discovering that a child raised the way I advised is even more amazing that I hypothesized! I wish people knew how easy and fun and just incredible and smart and capable and competent "normal" two-year-olds are.
Update: Anders is almost 4 and he has yet to come running to my room after a bad dream. He sleeps with me some nights and in his own bed some nights. It's all up to him. During stressful times he sleeps more often with me.
Update: Anders is almost 4 and he has yet to come running to my room after a bad dream. He sleeps with me some nights and in his own bed some nights. It's all up to him. During stressful times he sleeps more often with me.
Update: Anders started getting nightmares at age seven when he started reading Harry Potter. Happily, he is old enough to understand that the nightmares are a result of reading Harry Potter and that he has to decide whether he wants to read HP or not have nightmares. The desire to read HP outweighs the desire to not have nightmares so, he accepts them. He is now almost nine years old and, though he admits to having nightmares, has never once come to my room in the middle of the night complaining or feeling too afraid to go back to sleep.
I always think of this post when my 4 year old explains he is afraid of the dark and of windows. I wonder if I did something wrong. We don't do monsters or any scary stuff, or fantasy. He suggests that he doesn't like the dark because he feels vulnerable. He doesn't like that he can't scan the entire room and know all his surroundings. He also doesn't like windows (in the dark) because he doesn't want to be surprised by an animal outside that he can't see. He thinks an animal is going to look at him from outside, and this, to him, is frightening. I think these might be survival instincts in play?
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